Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Stab Me

As I sit here watching the end of the Mavs/Suns game, I finally realize that I hate Bill Walton. Hate. Seriously. Listening to him ramble on about the game he used to "play" just makes me want to throw up. As a matter of fact, I hate Luke Walton. Mainly just because he looks just like his Cindy Brady talking father Bill. This got me thinking of who I really hate. Here we go...

1. Bill Walton - In this list of course is anyone with any relation to him. i.e. - Luke Walton, Bill Walsh, Steve Walsh, Steve Burelien, Steve Madden, John Madden, John Rocker, The inventory of the Rocking Chair, "The Chair" by George Straight, Jeff George, Geogre Michaels (and his sports machine), Michael Jackson (the Browns receiver, not the singer), Jack Johnson, Jack Black, Randy Johnson, Randy Quaid, Dennis Quaid, Dennis Eckersley, Rocky Dennis, Rocky I-IV, Rocky Road, "Country Road" by John Denver, Denver Broncos, Bronco Billy, Billy Williams, Roy Williams, Patrick Roy, Roy Rogers and of course Satan.

2. Shannon Sharpe - Watch CBS on Sunday during football season and see if your eyes and ears bleed as bad as mine did.

3. Benny Hinn - Seriously, you don't have enough money? You really need me to donate? Ok, well this is the last time.

4. The energetic guy from the HSN show selling baseball cards and knives and shit - Don't get me wrong, I love my new kitchen knives and my ps9 Griffey Jr. rookie card, but he really beats me down. And by beats me down, I of course mean he has maxed out all of my credit cards and all I have to show for it are 75 boxes in my living room filled with crap waiting to never be used.

5. Jeff Foxworthy - "If you draw in crayon and stay inside the might be smarter than a fifth grader."


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