Okaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy!!!!

Lord what's wrong with me? I have been sitting on this for the better half of a week. What kind of excuse do I have for breaking this story so late? Squirts? No, that won't work. Busy with work? Keep trying. Computer problems? Yes, that's good, I'll roll with that. Why am I typing every word I am thinking? Shit. I like grizzly men. Really? That's odd. I never knew that before. You do now. Who was that? It's your subconcience. Why are you here and why the hell am I still typing everything I think? I don't know, your the dumbshit working the fingers. Just get to the story and shut the hell up. OK. OK.

This just in to the D and D home office laptop while I'm dropping the deuce...John Amaechi has come out of the closet. The greatest NBA center of all time random black man that played basketball emerged from his closet this week, saw his shadow and now that fucker has cursed us with 6 more years of gayness. With an exclusive statement with D and D Amaechi said this..
"Who are you guys again? Oh, and I'm gay. HOLLAAAAAAAA!!!!"

In a related story, Punxsutawney Phil confirmed reports this week that he in fact is gay. This started an uproar among the Christians of this great land and now they are refusing to take his advice. Rev. Lucy Furr had this to say,
"Fuck that little gay rat, I'll start spring when I feel like it."
D and D "A little harsh language there rev."
Rev. "Oh, sorry. I meant God hates gays and that rat will burn in hell. Praise Jesus."

Phil had this to say
"Who are you guys again? Oh, never heard of you. Anyways I have been coming out of the closet every fucking year since 1886. What is wrong with you people. And why aren't you wearing pants?"

With that, The pantless D and D crew took off drunk through the streets of Punxsutawney while children yelled "look Phil is coming out of his hole!"

Poon