Tuesday, November 6, 2007

OHIO ROCKS.....and then you fall face first into a wall drunk and break a mirror

This past weekend, the millionaire writers of your beloved D&D gathered together in the great city of Columbus, Ohio to give praise to the holier than holy tOSU. I'm done. I've completely sold out. I AM A BUCKEYE! To hell with the Aggies of which I have devoted my life to this point...I am fucking sold! A huge thank you goes out to my brothers up there for one of the best weekends of my life. I didn't want it to come to an end. What did we do you ask? Other than milking each other dry, we drank.....and drank......and for the love of God we drank.
Enough of the pole smoking, we are a sports blog dammit and we should write about sports. That is why I took it upon myself to decide once and for all which is more annoying.....1980's black man or 2007 black man.
Yeah, I'm going there. Don't get me wrong I have nothing against black people....I own a color TV. Hell, I own 2 so get off of my big black ass. Let's start.....

1980's black man
would often become lazy and quit his job. This soon led to losing his car, home and ruining his credit.
2007 black man now works and complains that he does not get paid as much as the white man.
ADVANTAGE: PUSH

1980's black man
makes rap music with his "posse" and smokes weed. That eventually led to cocaine and then usually hookers. The most famous to my knowledge was Eazy-E which not only led the rock star life, but then died from the AID that he got from some stupid bitch with a nappy ass weave. (listen to Boyz in the Hood and you will understand)
2007 black man makes rap music with his "homies" and smokes weed. This eventually leads to cocaine and then usually hookers. The software upgraded 2007 version now takes this to another level. There is more shooting of his fellow brothers now more than ever just because someone scuffed up his Pumas and called his mother a bizzle fo rizzle.
ADVANTAGE: PUSH

Now there are quite a few things that black people have over us. For example:
1. They have the biggest dicks I have ever had my hands around.....oh wait...I mean........no, that's actually what I meant.
2. They can weigh 350 and still get ass. Shit. I don't weigh that much and I go through a jar of peanut butter a week.
3. Sports.....enough said.

Final verdict.......PUSH





Stay black

Poon-rizzle

3 comments:

PK said...

Nice, another convert to the nation of Buckeye. I knew you'd be hooked, and not because of your weak mind and loose morals either, but because it's the right thing to do.

Al Sharpton said...

80's brother vs. 07 brother? Oh no you didn't. Lsiten here dummass. I'll come down on you like a tun of bricks, you honky m-fer. Prepare to have your headquarters picketed like a bitch. I'll do it too. I'm seriously on the phone right now with Jesse Jackson, Louis Farrakhan, Okrah Winfield and Jaleel White. (He feels left out if we don't invite him to whitey protest.)

We'll pull an apology out of your white ass before you can say Jackie Robinson, Beeeeeeyyaaaaatch!

Micheal Richards said...

That was hilarious. Jimmy the Greek is sitting here laughing his ass off. Are you related to Barak Obama, too?