Thursday, October 21, 2010
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Getting off the Schneid
Although fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to get through college, it does just fine in terms of moth-balling a blog for more than a year.There was certain addictive comfort in the realization that we could sit around unkempt in our bathrobes, eating Cheetos, and temporarily staining our genitals with a deep orange (and tasty) coating, but when one of our own referred to us as gentlemen, we knew it was time to break the silence. No more "silent but deadly" from our camp. More like "loud and putrid." Buckle-up gentle readers because we are back and better than ever.
OK - that was ambitious.
We're back...until the next bulk Cheetos purchase - when we promise to pay for 13 bags in the 10 Items or Fewer line.
Boom - FACIAL!!!
My name is Buckeye Savant. I'm a Libra, my favorite color is scarlet, I like walks in the rain, and I am OUT.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Put The Gun Down
Stop it. Not kidding. Stop it. It's not over.
I can't tell you how many calls I've had tonight from my d-bag friends saying that the season is over. Are you serious? Have you not realized yet that college football is the most exciting sport in this God forsaken world for a reason? Did you spend the entire 2007 season tattooing "jackpot!" on your taint?
The thing that we all must realize is that nothing fucking matters right now. This is a long season and I know that we have some bullshit teams that are gong to run the board but we have to stay eagerly waiting for the next upset to happen. It. Will. Happen.
Is it going to be another number 1? Maybe not, but a top 5 I guarantee. Mark it. That is the beauty of college football and the reason that we stay glued to the tv each week even through games we could personally give two shits about. For the upsets.
Am I sad? Abso-fucking-lutely you soulless Nazi Hitler. But stay strong and the promised land will arrive sooner than you think.
Also on a related note, I despise Boise State. I would rather jerk off Lenny Kravitz with my asshole than watch you in another bowl game? Take your Statue of Liberty play and shove it up your big blue ass!
Also do yourself a favor and read this.
http://www.playboy.com/magazine/features/pole-dancing/pole-dancing.html
Cordially,
Poon
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
I can't tell you how many calls I've had tonight from my d-bag friends saying that the season is over. Are you serious? Have you not realized yet that college football is the most exciting sport in this God forsaken world for a reason? Did you spend the entire 2007 season tattooing "jackpot!" on your taint?
The thing that we all must realize is that nothing fucking matters right now. This is a long season and I know that we have some bullshit teams that are gong to run the board but we have to stay eagerly waiting for the next upset to happen. It. Will. Happen.
Is it going to be another number 1? Maybe not, but a top 5 I guarantee. Mark it. That is the beauty of college football and the reason that we stay glued to the tv each week even through games we could personally give two shits about. For the upsets.
Am I sad? Abso-fucking-lutely you soulless Nazi Hitler. But stay strong and the promised land will arrive sooner than you think.
Also on a related note, I despise Boise State. I would rather jerk off Lenny Kravitz with my asshole than watch you in another bowl game? Take your Statue of Liberty play and shove it up your big blue ass!
Also do yourself a favor and read this.
http://www.playboy.com/magazine/features/pole-dancing/pole-dancing.html
Cordially,
Poon
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
Location:Waimea St,Frisco,United States
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